How to Create Open Communication with Your Kids: The Power of Active Listening

Many parents tell their kids and teens, “You can come to me with anything.” While I believe most parents mean this sincerely, sometimes their body language tells a different story. If you truly want to create an environment where your child feels comfortable coming to you with anything—whether it's about relationships, peer pressure, or sensitive topics like sex education—it’s essential that you actively listen to them.

Active listening is more than just hearing words—it’s about creating a safe space where your child feels seen, heard, and understood. By mastering this skill, you can build a stronger relationship with your child and encourage open, honest conversations for years to come.

Why Active Listening Matters

As parents, it’s natural to want to jump in with advice or solutions when our kids open up to us. However, sometimes they just need us to listen. When your child comes to you with something important, whether big or small, they’re looking for validation and understanding. Your body language can say a lot about how open you are to that conversation.

When your body is closed off—arms crossed, avoiding eye contact, distracted by your phone—it sends a subtle message to your child that you might not be fully present or available for them. If you want to truly be there for your child, it’s important to be aware of these non-verbal cues and actively work on creating a welcoming space for them.

How to Practice Active Listening with Your Child

1. Stop what you’re doing: When your child comes to you with something, pause what you’re doing. Put down your phone, close the laptop, or turn off the TV. Show them that they are the priority.

2. Give them your full attention: Eye contact is key. When you make eye contact, it shows that you are fully engaged in the conversation. Your child will feel more comfortable sharing and feel that you genuinely care about what they have to say.

3. Ask open-ended questions: Instead of jumping to conclusions or offering advice immediately, ask questions that help them go deeper. For example, “How did that make you feel?” or “Tell me more about that.” These questions invite them to open up and help you understand their perspective.

4. Validate their feelings: It’s important to acknowledge their emotions. For example, “It sounds like that situation made you really upset,” or “I can see how that would be confusing.” This helps your child feel understood.

5. Reflect back what you hear: Repeat back to your child what they’ve said to make sure you understand correctly. For example, “So, what I’m hearing is that you’re feeling worried about your upcoming test because of how much pressure you’re feeling. Is that right?” This not only ensures you’re on the same page but also shows your child you’re really paying attention.

6. Give them space to ask questions: After listening, give your child the opportunity to ask you anything. Respect their curiosity and provide thoughtful, honest answers. You might say, “Is there anything you’d like to ask me about this?” or “What do you think about this situation?”

How This Helps Your Child Feel Safe

When you open your heart and uncross your arms, you’re signaling to your child that you are truly available for them. They’ll feel safe knowing they can come to you with anything—whether it’s about their body, relationships, or tough life choices. This can make all the difference in your child’s ability to make informed, healthy decisions in the future.

Creating this environment of open communication is a skill that takes time and effort, but it’s completely worth it. When your child knows they can trust you, they will be more likely to seek your advice, guidance, and support when it matters most.

Ready to Learn More? Get the Clarify Bundle Today!

If you want to master the art of active listening and foster open communication with your child, I’ve got a free resource just for you! My Clarify Sex Education Bundle isn’t just about teaching sex education—it’s also about providing you with the tools you need to actively listen, open up those tough conversations, and connect with your child on a deeper level.

Download the free Clarify Bundle today to get started on building a strong, healthy relationship with your child and ensure that they always know they can come to you with anything.